repost: my life and other sordid tales

Special thanks to Indianapolis blogger Christopher M Turner for this thought-provoking fable from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation: The Fox and the Stork.

serenity-prayer280

One evening the fox invited his friend the stork to dinner. For a joke, the fox prepared soup and served it in a shallow dish. The fox could easily lap up the soup. But the stork, with its long bill, went hungry. The fox gave the stork a sly grin and said, “I am so sorry. It seems as if the soup is not to your liking.”

“There is no need to apologize,” the stork replied. “I would like to repay your hospitality and invite you to dinner tomorrow night.”

The next evening, the stork served the fox a meal in a long-necked jar with a narrow mouth. The stork could easily reach into the jar and eat, but the fox could not and went hungry. “I will not apologize for the dinner,” the stork said. “because one bad turn deserves another.” After that, the fox and the stork were no longer friends.

The Moral of the story: Revenge may be sweet, but the damage it does cannot be repaired.

No matter how wronged you may feel by the words or actions of another, remember that revenge, retaliation, and harboring resentment serve no useful purpose.

I will let go of past resentments and consider no one to be my enemy.

You are reading from the book:

Morning Light

by Amy E. Dean © 2011 Hazelden Foundation

via Nov. 29, 2018 – Readings in Recovery: Today’s Gift from Hazelden Betty Ford Foundation — My life and other sordid tales

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repost: stopping the negative thoughts

Ever had one of those circle one: (days) (weeks) (months) (years) — and I know you know what I mean here — where everything just majorly sucked? Katie at How I Killed Betty! walks through the basics of stopping those relentless negative thoughts that tend to. Drag. Us. Down.

Do you have a habit of thinking about something vaguely depressing or negative (usually about the past) that within minutes can be blown out of all proportion? And one’s musings seem to slide downwards into the dark murky waters of depression? Well, in the wonderful world of CBT* there is a name for this:

Rumination.

Easy, encouraging read with interesting, doable points. Definitely worth bookmarking. Because it’s not for you, right? It’s just that you know someone who definitely would benefit from reading this. Of course.

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

repost: time flies when you’re anxious and self-medicated

Outstanding post from one of my regular reads that brings back some old, yet still quite memorable moments in time. I hardly know where to begin. Joy and I have hit some amazing resorts in the Caribbean and Mexico: the Dominican Republic (2x), Costa Rica, and both Mexican coasts (4x) have left indelible imprints in what is left of my memory cells. That being said…

It was on our Feb. 27th, 2010, flight home from my weeklong 60th birthday party at the Moon Palace in Punta Cana that we had a conversation as to whether we may have an alcohol problem. Gotta start somewhere, right? BTW, just for the record, in every photo in that particular photo album, no matter where I am or what I’m doing or what time of day or night, I have a serious drink in my hand. Which is probably why precisely one month later I introduced myself at a meeting Club East and said, “My name is Greg and I’m an alcoholic.”

So for that reason, I love what time flies… says about dealing with crises in a sober life on life’s sober terms. The following is one example of several in a very profound entry, so go read the whole thing.

The first took me by surprise almost immediately upon arriving in Mazatlan.  My parents and their friends were out of control!  I’m talking folks in their 70s  (in varying degrees of physical shape and general health) being so drunk they were stumbling and falling down on cobblestone streets and around a pool.  I felt like I was babysitting, and it really pissed me off!

  See what I mean? Good stuff.

daily reflection: active guardians

To us, however, it represents far more than a sound public relations policy. It is more than a denial of self-seeking. This Tradition is a constant and practical reminder that personal ambition has no place in A.A. In it, each member becomes an active guardian of our Fellowship.

— TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, p. 183

The basic concept of humility is expressed in the Eleventh Tradition: it allows me to participate completely in the program in such a simple, yet profound, manner; it fulfills my need to be an integral part of a significant whole. Humility brings me closer to the actual spirit of togetherness and oneness, without which I could not stay sober. In remembering that every member is an example of sobriety, each one living the Eleventh Tradition, I am able to experience freedom because each one of us is anonymous.