repost: bridging the emotional distance

One of my favorite bloggers writes with painful honesty of the healing her marriage is going through as they both recover, and the image I’m left with is one of turning an aircraft carrier around at sea.

“I can’t pinpoint exactly when and what caused the distance between us. 7 years of infertility? Fulltime jobs? Children? Depression? It was all of the above plus a lack of effort to make time for each other.

But, most of all, I mustn’t forget my drinking.”

What I found most encouraging was her steadfast and clear-headed self-examination in picking through the parts of her broken life that needed to be reassembled, while discarding those pieces that no longer serve any useful, i.e. healthy purpose.

My Healing Recovery

Bridging Emotional Distance

Alcohol has significantly impacted my ability to emotionally connect with people.   The relationship I have with my husband is where the emotional distance feels the most obvious. And, as the fog of alcohol clears from my head, I see just how much our relationship has been breached.

We started out with a deep emotional connection where we shared intimate details about ourselves. My husband recalls these bygone days and longs for the time when I depended on him for just about everything. Of course, I remember those early days too; but I’ve changed so much that I don’t see those days ever returning.

I can’t pinpoint exactly when and what caused the distance between us. 7 years of infertility? Fulltime jobs? Children? Depression? It was all of the above plus a lack of effort to make time for each other.

But, most of all, I mustn’t forget my drinking.

When…

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About greg w

I believe chocolate in virtually any configuration is the finest dessert in the history of mankind. I believe my wife is the sexiest woman in the world. I believe modern capitalism will never be replaced by a different -- or better -- form of economics. I believe in clutch hitting in baseball. I believe the Kimber 1911 .45 ACP is the finest handgun ever made in America. I believe the Mossberg Flex 500 pump-action 12 gauge shotgun is the best home defense ever made in America. I believe Tom Waits is the best song writer of my generation. I believe unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. I believe in equality for everyone, except reporters and photographers. As CS Lewis once beautifully wrote, I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else. I believe that, on balance, Christianity has done more good for humans than bad. I believe it is better to tell the truth than a lie. I believe it is better to be free than to be a slave. I believe it is better to know than to be ignorant. And I believe if I yell at the TV during a Colts game, they will play better.

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